Sunday, January 23, 2011

alive and kicking

I hate when life keeps me from blogging - almost as much as I hate missing sleep (which I am doing right now, to catch you up)

So, the updates:

Hubby and I never actually had that talk that I planned.  He got home really late that night, so I didn't have a chance to butter him up.

I have tried to bring things up a few times since then, but my timing seriously sucks.  Giving up on 'the talk' for now.

HOWEVER.....

Things are getting a little bit better.  Slowly but surely.

Hubby is using his leave time to 'nest', which he has never really done in the four years we've lived here, or really even at our old house.  He is taking on home improvement projects that I never even knew he wanted to do, and has literally made a difference in every room in the house.  He even helped the kids tear apart and reorganize the playroom!  My favorite project so far: we got new bedroom furniture!  We still have to put the bed frame together today, and I really wish I had taken a 'before' picture.  We have been using t.v. trays as nightstands in our room for four years, and our bed has never had a real frame with a headboard.  Kind of cool to be actual grownups now.  :)  And part of me hopes that his extra efforts in the bedroom will not stop at buying furniture, of course! *WINK*

I do have to say, that area has improved a little, as well.  Not a lot, but still.....something is better than nothing.  In time, I think we could possibly get back to our old '2 or 3 times a week' habit.  And maybe some of those times won't be a QUICKIE?  Not that I am complaining, of course - a quickie is still fun!  But the thing I miss the most about our sex life is the intimacy, and there really isn't much time to connect when there's no foreplay, and very little cuddling afterward. 

We'll get there, eventually.

In the meantime, I am trying REALLY hard to focus on my own health, especially my weight.  I am walking more, eating less, and making better food choices overall.  This is really not that hard.  The difficult thing for me is to find another coping mechanism besides food to get me through the rough times.  When I am having a bad day, I eat.  When I am sad/lonely/angry etc, I eat.  This is clearly not doing me (or my sex life) any favors, so I am putting a stop to it - but needing a new vice. I need something less damaging to do for comfort.

Any suggestions? 

What do you do to pull yourself out of a funk?  Or, when you need to have a pity party all by yourself, what do you reach for?  (please don't say ice cream, because that's exactly what I need to get AWAY from).

1 comments:

Basinah said...

Glad to hear things are going a bit better; I have been thinking about you.

I have no advice on getting out of a funk, I find it varies with the funk. Sometimes it is coming and writing it all out, sometimes it is hitting the gym like a maniac, usually music helps. Sometimes, if the funk is deep, I have to rely on others to pull me out to a place I can start trying again. For me, food never really helps at all.

~~hugs~~, and I hope the road keeps getting smoother

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